I'm going to share something with you that will change your mindset and change your life. You know I always talk about the power of your headspace. Let me give you some insight into my headspace that is top level information for you to become the person and leader you desire.
If you're like me, you value your introspective nature and the great insight gained from slowing life down and tuning into your thoughts and feelings. One of the things I've been ruminating on is regaining the physical agility, strength and mental stamina I used to have before major life and career changes caused me to lose it. Actually, scratch that. Major life and career changes may have impacted it, but the truth of the matter is that I made choices that didn't align with keeping fitness as one of my core values. I'm on a mission to return my fitness to an optimal state.
Have you recently checked in on where you're at with living your values? List your top 10 values and rate them on a scale of 1 to 10 (10 being that you couldn't live those values any more if you tried). Where are you at? Be honest with yourself. Notice how real I was with myself and all of you a moment ago? You need to be that real in answering that question to yourself. Only through truth will our minds shift to a place of deep analysis and realization. What steps do you need to take to live your values at the level you desire? Set bigger goals? Try harder next time? Those approaches won't work in isolation.
Here's my approach. I've used it in so many areas in my life that I guarantee that it will work for you but only if you trust and fully see through the process.
I determine who I want to be and ensure that the majority of my choices (i.e., my habits) in every moment in life align with the identity I'm pursuing. In case you're wondering, it's not a false or inauthentic identity, it's a different way of looking at goal formation and the achievement of them. For example, instead of driving to the local convenient store, I ask myself, "Would an athlete make that choice?" The answer is 'no', an athlete wouldn't and I get ready to go for a walk or I hop on the pedal bike for a ride.
The more choices you make in alignment with the person you want to be, the more you become that person.
The shift in mindset is so critical that it's important to watch how you speak about yourself and whether your words and phrases are in alignment with the identity you want to be. Let's say I am trying to quit smoking and someone offers me a cigarette. I could say, "No, thanks. I'm trying to quit." which then implies that I'm still smoker. If I were to say instead, "No, thanks. I don't smoke." my brain believes even more that I'm not a smoker and it reinforces my thought process and my decisions (i.e., my habits) that align with the identity I want to be. I was on a bike ride with my husband the other day and about six kilometers in we started going up this long incline. Inclines often challenge me so he mentioned that we could stop any time. I said, "No, thanks. I'm an athlete." Someone overhearing my comment might question whether I'm an athlete but that's okay! In my mind, I'm an athlete and an athlete would tune into their mental game and keep going. I kept going.
Small changes. Big impact. James Clear speaks about this in his book, Atomic Habits.
How does this connect to your work life? Very easily. What type of leader do you want to be? Before you miss a deadline without giving the person a heads up, take credit for someone else's work, or lose control of your emotions, think before you act and ask yourself, "Would the leader I want to be make this same choice or behave the same way?" If the answer is 'no' then act accordingly.
Interested in doing a values exercise to determine your top values and how you're living them, or unpacking the leader or person you want to be? Send me a quick email. I'd love to chat with you. With the right support, I'll help you make this easier than you think.